Tre donne descrivono un parto traumatico e affermano di non essere state ascoltate
https://news.sky.com/story/three-women-describe-traumatic-childbirth-and-say-they-werent-listened-to-13477907
di sjw_7
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10 commenti
My experience of being a dad to two kids is that the third example is pretty normal: we luckily had a good maternity service and even there it was a bit of a carousel of bringing mothers in, waiting for the birth to be close to a medical emergency then doing something about it, at which point it was dealt with effectively. My wife’s waters broke on one birth and we were still in the pre-natal ward 12 hours later. I imagine if something happened “too quickly” that absolutely would be the situation. It’s the kind of thing we could do better for mothers.
What I don’t get is the idea that you’re robbed of a magical experience though – what magical experience involves shitting yourself before passing a watermelon?! Who doesn’t go into child birth thinking “this might be a bit of an unpleasant ride?”
Third one fairly similar to our second baby. Despite my wife crying out for pain relief she was given absolutely nothing with no explanation as to why.
Eventually we found out the anethesist was busy.
My wife got given a couple paracetamol and had to give birth without any other pain relief.
The maternity ward was all over the place with us, and while the midwives were great the process itself wasn’t. They practically forced a premature delivery because they kept saying the baby wasn’t developing but there was two months of consistently miss -measuring him in the womb. Pain relief was given but we think they intentionally let it run out to make her push more.
Aftercare is pretty shite too my partner and several people I know all ended up paying for private services to sort out post pregnancy issues because the NHS simply isn’t bothered.
The third one is a major failing of the system. Maternity wards don’t have a dedicated anaesthetist but just the one who works in the hospital itself and so could be anywhere at anytime. This is despite the fact epidurals are a very common request.
Maternity care is different to the majority of reasons someone would end up in a hospital because the patient isn’t actually ill at all, and in the majority of cases doesn’t need much in the way of intervention at all and often intervention can have a negative outcome.
The mental state of the mother is a prime factor in the outcome for years to come following birth. Yet, many hospital treat childbirth as an illness that is to be cured..
This is something women with children discuss every time there’s a new baby. Maybe once or twice someone’s had a good delivery. Everyone else absolutely traumatised, including me. I’m struggling to put into words what I felt but it can give me nightmares 27 years later and I’m not the only one. It’s beyond a system failure when it’s EVERY woman I have ever spoken to regardless of age
Edited to add because I see a lot of man talking about their partners experiences. I cannot emphasize enough how life altering it is. You never trust doctors again. No amount of “well you’re both alive and that’s what counts” helps. So just let her talk and hug her
My wife’s second baby, she was in labour and was in incredible pain. The nurse came by and said “I only checked you 20 mins ago, there is no way you are any further forward” I can run you a bath and can’t give you anything other than paracetamol.
15 mins later my daughter had to be caught in the bathroom or she would have fell on the floor.
This absolutely gives me chills, it’s unbelievably horrifying what these poor women have been through. I consider myself so incredibly lucky that the Head Midwife happened to be around for my son’s birth and looked after me very well through my his heart rate dropping drastically during my labour as it could have been so different. My heart absolutely breaks for all the women who don’t have the supportive care they deserve during such a vulnerable time.
3rd kid was very similar to some of the experiences here.
Midwives were not listening to the missus nor believing her. Almost ended terribly.
Some stern words were said by me that’s about it in terms of consequences I believe despite reporting the whole episode.
With my first I knew something was wrong and kept telling them something was wrong and was ignored because “I’ve not done it before so how would I know?”. Turns out after a day and a half I was right, despite contractions I wasn’t dilating and my heart rate and my sons heart rate was plummeting and he was getting distressed and defecated inside me causing us to have to stay in and both on antibiotics. With my second, I had to be induced but before I had time for my body to respond, she came out fast, tearing me open from the inside and pulling everything out with her (less than 2 months later I prolapsed), the doctors and midwives were crap and told me to stop being dramatic. As it was Covid rules, my partner wasn’t allowed with and I was dumped in a side room, an hour after birth on a broken bed from 2am to 3pm in the afternoon without a single check up on me, nothing to drink or eat and no sleep because the one midwife woke my baby up when I first got into the room and I then couldn’t put her down so I had to sit up with her, awake, the whole time, bleeding more heavily than I should have been. Again I was being dramatic.
I’m now foolishly pregnant with my third child (Contraception isn’t 100% and unfortunately got me) still having bad anxiety at the thought of birth and when I met with the doctor to discuss birth plans I was dismissed and told “Birth is birth, we all do it” despite my explanation of my previous experiences and saw me for only 2 minutes, disappointing because you would hope a female doctor would have some compassion and a better understanding.
I have also read recently that my local hospital had an incredibly bad reputation for care of expectant mothers and babies, including leading to deaths. Their care hasn’t changed despite these reports.